Are any of these familiar to you?
You never listen to me.
You’re angry all the time.
I can never be good enough for you.
I can’t trust you again.
I don’t have hope for us anymore.
Do you want to…
Communicate with more ease and connection?
Resolve old disappointments and hurts?
Learn to work effectively with anger and frustration?
If any of these describe your feelings about your relationship, it may be time to see a couples therapist who can help you communicate in a deeper and loving manner. Couples argue, give the silent treatment and hurt one another in a many different ways. However, the question that fuels these fights is almost always the same: “do I matter to you?” We carry this question, often buried, under more superficial relationship problems and concerns.
We do not know what to do with this uncertainty and need for validation, so we’re often left feeling frustrated, resentful, and defeated, and as though the relationship is broken beyond repair. I will help you regain the safety and security in your relationship. During our time together, you will learn how vulnerability, as well as getting to the root of the conflict, can lead to a new and deeper connection to each other.
The way I work with couples differs from most therapists as I do not focus solely on improving communication. Instead, I utilize EFT (Emotionally Focused Therapy), a relationship therapy model created by Susan Johnson, Ph.D. With EFT, I define the dynamics of a relationship and validate the feelings and concerns of each partner and move beyond the surface to underlying conflicts. I will teach you how to step back, understand, and move beyond the destructive dynamics that have been silently eroding your relationship, and allow you to see each other through empathic and loving eyes. Couples have repeatedly told me that they have a deeper and stronger connection than they ever had before going through counseling for couples with me.